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Connecting Inside and Outside




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Recommended to Better Understand This Topic:

Bob Cooley explaining the different inside and outside phenomena people experience and how to navigate those waters.

Physical, Thinking, Emotional, Spiritual

The Physical Parts of Yourself and Anger/Love, Processing Anger and Allowing Your Attention to Be Inside, The Thinking Parts of Yourself and Fear/Clarity, Processing Fear and Allowing Your Attention to Be Inside, The Emotional Parts of Yourself and Anxiety/Satisfaction, Processing Anxiety and Allowing Your Attention to Be Outside, The Spiritual Parts of Yourself and Fright/Calm, Processing Fright and Allowing Your Attention to Be Outside, The Purpose of Positive and Negative Instincts/Emotions, Connecting the Inside and Outside Worlds With Your Attention, Half the Types Being Predominately Inside or Outside With Their Attention



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(Revised and Edited For Easier Readability and Additional Clarity)

Okay. Let's talk about what's happening outside and what's happening inside, how to process things that are in and how to process things that are outside. Well I think everybody knows that there's a physical part of you and there's the psychological part of yourself. And they know there's this emotional part of yourself and a spiritual part of yourself. There's four parts. The physical part of yourself is very much associated with the instincts of being very loving and when your relationship with an outside object isn't working, then you're angry. The thinking part of yourself (the psychological part) is associated with being either fearless or fearful. So you're afraid when you don't know something and then when you know it, you're fearless. The emotional part of yourself is associated with being really excited about something and being satisfied or being anxious because you don't have satisfaction yet. And the spiritual part of yourself is associated with being very calm or peaceful and frightened when things on the outside are dangerous to you.


So the question is, where is your attention when those different part of you are operating? In some situations, you're more emotional and social. In other situations, you're more physical and active. In other situations, you're much more analytical and problem-solving. And in other situations, you're much more spiritual or practical. Well, where the attention goes in order to process these four instincts is quite different. Let's start with the first part, the physical part.


In the physical world, you're taking your information from your five outside senses and all of that's pouring inside of you. And as it comes in, you find yourself relating to how that makes you feel. If it's working okay for you then you feel very loving and if it's not working for you, then you feel angry about what's actually going on. Well, something has to telling you that it's not working and the anger tells you that. So instead of just thinking of anger as a bad thing, I would think of it as, "Oh something's telling you the relationship between you and the outside world isn't working." And so the question is, when whatever's coming into you that you're getting angry about it (for whatever reason), how do you process that anger? Well, acting it out doesn't work so well. And we're not talking about people being perfect, but if you keep staying inside when you're feeling angry, you'll process that feeling as that's coming into you (you feeling angry). And then when you feel angry, if you keep processing that (having that anger), you're aware your attention is inside. And if you do this successfully, you'll come up with an idea to cause a resolution in conflict.


For the thinking part of yourself, when you don't know something you become afraid. Well, something has to tell you when you don't know. Otherwise, you would think you knew all the time. So when you don't know something you feel afraid. Well again, whatever it is that you don't know about, that's coming into you and as it comes in, you feel afraid. So what you need to do is keep feeling afraid and when you do, that fear will direct your attention to what to pay attention to inside of yourself. And then all of a sudden you discover what you didn't know because you're the center for creating knowledge.


In the emotional world, in the emotional part of yourself, you want satisfaction. You have desires and when something on the outside satisfies you, then you feel very excited. But when you're not satisfied, you start to feel anxious. So something has to tell you when you're not satisfied and that's anxiety. So when you're anxious about something, you have a desire inside and it drives your attention outside to try to discover something that would satisfy you. And when you do that and you keep doing that, you process the anxiety until you engage with something that actually gives you satisfaction.


The last one is the spiritual part of yourself which is where you're not feeling peaceful or serene or calm in a situation because something on the outside is perceived as frightening. So here you are on the inside, you're feeling frightened and how do you process that? Well you're already have the inside running because inside you feel frightened. So then your attention has to go outside to make a connection between the inside and outside. And as you put your attention outside on whatever is frightening you, you'll process that and then you actually get to be calm and peaceful again because you'll have the perspective and practical answer about what to do.


So most people think of these negative emotions as a bad thing. No, it's just that you have a positive instinct or you have a negative instinct. And the positives all mean that things are working for you so everything's good, but something has to tell you when things aren't working. And so people call those negatives and they don't want to have the negatives. No, no, the negatives are telling you that you're either angry about something because a relationship isn't working or you're afraid because you don't know something or you're anxious because you're unsatisfied or that you're frightened because the situation isn't calm and something needs to happen to change that situation. So the whole basis of how to deal with what's inside and what's outside is really is how to keep them connected all the time. So in the physical world, when you feel angry or loving, that's already happening inside. Reality and the world is pouring into you through your five senses so what you need to do is stay inside so the connection happens. In the thinking world, when you don't know something you feel afraid. You're inside feeling afraid so then you have to let that keep coming into you and you stay inside with that. And that creates again a connection between outside and inside. Then what happens is that you learn what you don't know. In the emotional world, when you're already inside having all these feelings of desires or excitement or anxiety, your attention has to go outside to make that connection so you can gauge with what would be satisfying for you. And in the spiritual world again, here you are again having all these rumblings inside about how something outside is frightening you. You have to look outside so you have a connection between the inside and outside. So it's really not about having positive and negative emotions. It's really about making sure the inside and outside stay connected. If you don't know which one of those you're having (whether you're frightened or anxious or whatever), then let your attention go either out or in and see what starts to process for you.


I really like this idea that the negative emotions or the negative instincts aren't negative in the sense of being bad. Something has to tell you things aren't working and the positive tell you things are already working. By the way the negatives are much easier to handle than the positives. The opposite of what people would think. When you have those positive emotions of love and fearlessness and satisfaction and calm, that's telling you things are working pretty well. And that means whatever other deeper problems you have are going to start to surface. So then that's when people need support for themselves and other people around them because things are really good now and as a result they can afford to feel what's coming up into them. Whereas before then that's not going to come up. So it's much harder to handle the positives than it is the negatives. I think that's a good thing to know about.


There are 16 genetic personality types associated with 16 muscle groups and 16 organs. Half of them naturally keep their attention outside and half of them naturally keep their attention inside. When you have balancing personality types, one has their attention outside and one has the attention inside. And what they need to do is learn how to do the balance of those two things. So we need to get the balance. If you tend to have your attention inside, then the attention needs to learn how to be outside and how to process that and vice versa. Say you're a type, a physical type or a thinking type where you normally have your attention inside on what's going on inside. As you become more integrated and balanced, your attention will start to go outside. And when it goes outside actually you're going to realize that you already have all this stuff going on inside and so you have to go outside to get the second half of reality. So there's two views of reality. One from the inside and one from the outside. And half of the people do one and half do the other. So after awhile, when you're secure enough with either being in or out, you'll start to consider the other and then you'll get the full view of reality. Otherwise you only have half of the pixels of what reality's really like.


So I just wanna let you know that about there's an inside of a person and there's an outside of a person. And when you have different instincts going on, your attention needs to be either in or out in order to process those instincts. It's really that simple. There is a very special situation and that is when you become really balanced as your own type. For example, if you're a type where your attention's inside, all of a sudden instead of you being in with your attention, you're now out. The inside's working automatically. Or if you're a type where your attention's outside, all of a sudden your attention's going to be inside. And that's what's going to be happening to you. So you turn either inside out or outside in is what happens. And the other unusual thing that happens is that what you're normally conscious of as one type (whatever type that is), when you're balanced, you become aware of what the unconscious or your balancing type is aware of. So when you become balanced, a very unusual situation occurs where you go inside out and upside down. Why don't you find out? Have a great day.

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